


Everything, and then Nothing

by emptyswimmingpools



Category: The Maze Runner Series - All Media Types, The Maze Runner Series - James Dashner
Genre: Angst, Graphic Description, M/M, Metaphors, Non-Canonical Character Death, Plotless, So much angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-14
Updated: 2016-01-14
Packaged: 2018-05-14 00:34:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 491
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5722939
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/emptyswimmingpools/pseuds/emptyswimmingpools
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>
  <em>Barely anything felt real anymore — not without Newt.</em>
</p>
            </blockquote>





	Everything, and then Nothing

 

 

 

> _You can't give up. I won't let you._

 

Thomas' mind was a dark haze of blurred thoughts that had merged into one, besides the one exception that remained crystal clear; untouched, untampered, perfectly visible. Newt's words had imprinted a permanant message into his mind, easing him through his haphazardly made decisions, keeping him strong. He clung onto them like it was all he had left, despite the loyalty and friendship from his other friends.

The world was falling apart around him; everything he'd ever known was shattering into tiny, sharp shards of glass — hazardous, painful, and so, so _real_. Barely anything felt real anymore — not without Newt. He was the calm before the storm, the light to his dark. His sense of differentiating reality from unreality seemed to be growing weaker by the hour, minute, second. . .

White. Every blur of thought, every memory shard, everything except for one thing was fading into a dim white light that approached slowly; the words Newt had carefully reassured him with that night by the fire when he felt like giving up remained a glowing red.

Red, red, red. . .

Love was red; it bled into him slowly, seeping through his every nook and cranny, overpowering his being. It was fiery and destructive, possessing crevices in his mind that he wasn't aware he had. Red was anger. The betrayal he felt for Newt, for leaving him, for going against him, for _loving_ him so completely, irrefutably and recklessly despite his incessant desire for control; it was all ruby red. Newt was red. The clearest, brightest, most beautiful shade you could possibly fathom.

And yet red wasn't enough to keep him found — he was lost. So terribly, irreversibly lost in a sea of darkness that drowned him, suffocating his lungs.

Thomas lay helplessly unconscious and observed as the red slowly but surely lost its glow — it grew dimmer, now dull and dark, like the colour of blood that had been spilt impetuously from the wound in Newt that he himself had caused, to which he would most definitely feel guilt for if he wasn't slipping away leisurely.

Numbness succumbed him; there was everything, there was something, and then there was _nothing_. No emotion, no pressure, just blissful silence of mind and matter. Nothing mattered. Everything was insignificant — irrelevant. The glass shards had been swept away, the red had faded into white, and everything was lost. Remains were trivial.

Out of nowhere, the snow white blank canvas flashed; scarlet. There was something, but then, nothing. Over and over again, like a broken record player playing the same part on loop, or a never-ending slide show.

And then it was black. Black was the lack of colour; lack of Newt, lack of _life_. And it didn't flash and change this time. The world remained black, for Thomas was no longer in it.

 

> _I'm sorry I gave up, but you weren't there to stop me like you said you'd be._

**Author's Note:**

> i was rereading the series again (no surprise, really) and became randomly inspired, then this piece of shit happened. it's a bit messy and quite different to my usual stuff, but i hope you somewhat enjoyed reading regardless. feedback is appreciated, as always. love, riley x


End file.
